Thursday, August 25, 2005

How time flies

Many, many months since last posting and how things have changed.

For one: I am six months pregnant. Perhaps that explains general apathy and sluggishness March through May??

BabyHammy is due in December and I couldn't be happier (Mr. Hammy is nigh on to spastic). The only kicker is this: I really, REALLY don't like being pregnant. Now before some brain-surgeon out there starts tutt-tutting me and telling me it's all part of life and this wonderful process, they can crawl back into the Hallmark card they were barfed out of.

Seriously folks - it's all a sales pitch. Months one through three - no actual signs of a baby, just flu-like symptoms with the opportunity for ultra-sore breasts, acne, and bleeding gums. Woot! Bring it on!!

Months three through six - slowly growing out of all your clothes (like some bizarre closet-version of Survivor) and having to endure total strangers a) asking about your health or b) telling you about their own pregnancy experiences (when you haven't asked). I'm a fairly private person with a small group of close friends....this is fairly uncomfortable for me.

I actually had a woman come over to my desk the other day and ask me to stand up so that she could see my stomach. I told her I didn't know I'd been nominated to be the performing monkey of the day. You can see where my popularity comes from.

So everyone is sure that stork thing isn't true? How about the cabbage patch?