Saturday, May 30, 2009

It's been a long time comin'...

Well worth the wait? Not sure about that.

I haven't posted since January, and as I sit waiting for Hamlet to get out of bed one more time (I havta pee, Mommy), I can attempt to organize my thoughts.

If, for no other reason, than to move the announcement of Jaz's death farther down the page...

In March my grandmother died. She was 87 and the lymphoma that had been plaguing her for two years finally won. Her quality of life was good until the last three weeks and then it became too late too fast. I am sad that my son will not remember this wonderful woman, but we have pictures to show him - he and his Great Grandma sharing a couch; taking a stroll. We can keep her alive for him.

The funeral and interaction of my father and his siblings spiralled into the insanity that these things usually do. My father had flattered himself for years, saying that his family would never be so petty, so callous. Wrong and wrong sir. As he puts it himself, he's now offically an orphan. And I fear his relationship with his brothers and sister, tenuous at best due to half a country between them, are forever changed.

My job is looking more and more secure as my counterpart from our new parent company soundly proves himself incompetent. Oddly, to look good, I just have to tread water. (But I'm not, of course).

We are building a new house, which means we have to put this one up for sale. I don't really mind that part, but it's the preparation that's killing me. So many things to get done and so little energy left at the end of the day. I'm hoping, but not holding my breath, that the in-laws will take Hamlet for the weekend soon so Mister Hammy and I can bust out the final polishes. Hard to do when you're dancing attendance on a three year old.

And I sooo resent that every time I sit down, there's a little voice in my head saying "shouldn't you be painting/polishing/cleaning/sorting/arranging something?"


Speaking of the voice in my head....time to get back to it.